But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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