please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
