I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
