OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
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