Walk of Shame. In a state park.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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