She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
