no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
