margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
