You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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