but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize