Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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