Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
