I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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