Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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