Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize