at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
