Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
