you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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