I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
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