bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I need to calm my uterus...
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
