**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
grandma shit on top of the toilet
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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