did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
