yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
