if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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