What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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