so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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