After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Randomize
