NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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