is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
