The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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