help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
