what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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