ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
