She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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