She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I will be naked everywhere
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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