Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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