Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The best revenge is premature balding
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
