Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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