just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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