if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
