I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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