On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
