how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I understand Curling. That high.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
