I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
