first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
