i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Shame - the story of my life.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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