Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I met the friendliest cop last night
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
