Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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