just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
