4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
