i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize